When The Silence is Too Loud

When the Silence is Too Loud
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There is silence among our children. This silence has grown louder over decades and sexual assault is the number one cause. The children and students that we know, love and are privileged to see every day are most affected by this abuse. When asked in confidence about the reluctance to come forward there were many to disclose the same common denominators: fear and intimidation, lack of self-esteem and self-worth, and threat of loss and support.
Fear and intimidation play a major role in why children keep silent about sexual assault and abuse. 35% of children abused are between ages 12 and 17 and 69% of those abused stated that the abuse occurred in their residence. The abusers use fear and intimidation to make the child feel as though there will be negative consequences if they do not comply with the sexual advances and keep quiet about the request. “What goes on in this house stays in this house”, is a mentality promoted among abusers for the wrong reasons. Because of this aspect, over 70% of sexual abuse among children goes unreported.
Those who are more susceptible to sexual abuse are those with lack of self-esteem and self-worth. The abusers often make those they are abusing feel as if it were their fault. They are being treated that way because of something they did or did not do. This child oftentimes feels insignificant and feels as if they don’t mean much to their parents and they somewhat shut-down emotionally (scared silent).
Children naturally don’t want to cause confusion in the home or a rift in the family some would put it. The abuser will often make threats that imply if the child speaks of the abuse they may lose their home or have to move away. The abuser will often make appeals to the emotions of the child’s emotions saying that if they tell then they will be unable to work and continue supporting the family.
It is our responsibility to keep those we know and love safe. We must recognize the symptoms. Some show anger, depression, lack of motivation, and often want to isolate themselves. While others show no symptoms at all. We must provide an environment promotes healthy, effective communication regardless of what the consequences may be. We don’t “sweep things under the rug” or act as if “out of sight, out of mind”. We as family and neighbors within a tight-knit community must continue show love outwardly and that they are worth our time. The children are worth fighting for. We will take a stand for what is right. We will make ourselves available. We will pray, but no longer will we be silent!